Saturday, July 26, 2008

Determination to fulfill this.....

Japanese proficiency..... Probably insignificant to 99.99999% of people out there but I just want to prove to myself and show people that I can do it. I want people to acknowledge that I am actually effectively tri-lingual....

Impossible? Hopefully not.....

本当に日本語の勉強するのは私の興味です。日本人のようにペらペら話すできるになりたいです。私の希望です。無理ですか。もう一度学生になるのは出来ますか。日本へ日本語の勉強するのは欲しいです。しかしもう無理です。。。。 年齢のはもう年寄りですね。残念ですね。自分で一所懸命勉強してもいいよ。。。。今私の日本語の程度はどうですか。まだ下手ですか。だれかが教えてくざさいませんか。

Discovering myself

I was feeling sad just now and googled for "feeling sad".... Up came my blog! Guess it is official now, I am probably the #1 sad-feeling person on the face of this planet....

Yes, I am probably so much a nut-case that anyone who can decipher why I am always so depressed can win himself a Noble prize. Or maybe my Princess will finally be able to do that?

Distant past

Why do I like to stay in the East of the island? Not sure about the zillion of people snapping up properties here (at stupidly high prices I may add) but I was born and brought up in the end. The place just brings back fond memories for me.....

Joo Chiat of 30, 40 years ago was so different..... So much has changed. Growing up there, I remember the places where I either passed by or actually did something. The POSB bank that was near Joo Chiat place, buying stamps to paste to some cardboard thing as a form of savings. The very old library that was before the current Joo Chiat community centre. The barber and mechanic shops near the same location. The playground where the neighborhood police post now sits. The food centre across from it. The 7th month Ghost festivities. Many, many..... Just too many to list.

Childish but I wish I can go back to relive it just once more time. Be a primary student once again.... That will be fun. Don't need to study and yet pass examinations without raising a sweat. The luxury of having the afternoon after school to play with friends. Yes, yes, I am dreaming again.

Desperately seeking a house

Sitting here at home on a Saturday evening doing my own stuff. No Princess with me. No pet dog with me. No work allowed in my mind. Just plain old me in front of a notebook. The dusty stereo is on after a long time left unused. Relaxing? Yup, it does feel good. Just I, me, and myself..... Yeah but maybe just once in a while?

The economy is allegedly still very strong in the tiny island of Singapore. So strong that property prices are crazy.... just plain crazy. I can't buy a place that I like without saddling myself with a sizable housing loan. Yes, affordability is relative but in my opinion, the prices are so ridiculous that I would ask myself who the hell has so much money to finance a home purchase? Apparently more that I can count because everyone else is paying the crazy prices and driving everything up and up. I shall not bore anyone with figures but let's just say it will mean I must continue working without fail for the next 10 to 15 years just to buy a little box in the sky.

Despite all my valiant efforts to remain positive, I am not optimistic that I will be able to find myself a dream in the East side of the island where I have grow up in. Kind of sad if you ask me. Damn.....

Trying desperately to get a place so that I can move on to the next chapter with Princess. This I owe her, really.

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Damn job....

Really think I am being short-changed by working in this damn job and company. I am losing my happiness.... Can't even switch off my mind after I return home. Damn job.

Regardless, I need to bear with it until the very end and secure as big a fund nest as possible. Got to make my life work for me and Princess.

What's the worst that could happen to me if I am deemed "incompetent"?? I will get a good compensation package and my life back, that's what! Not too shabby! Let's do something different tonight!

Displacing unhappiness

I am striving to change myself. I am striving to change to a positive looking person So I went out trying to find happiness on the World Wide Web. I think I did find a place whereby I can fill myself with happy thoughts.

http://www.positivityblog.com/

Reading the entries in the blog I find myself thinking of my princess and how she has been trying to encourage me and help me get rid of my gloomy days. Not that she is not doing a good job but just that I am a hard nut to crack thus I guess I am a tough patient.

Well, hope that my efforts plus her encouragements will be able to pull me through all this.