Lazy

As much as I would like to say I am a very disciplined and motivated person, there are times when I would like to just sit back and relax and laze around and do absolutely nothing....

Tonight is probably one of those days. I have cleared most of my emails on Saturday and this Sunday (though since a lot of other commitments to do) and thus I can afford to just sit back and really relax a little.

Ever since I became the lowly manager of my department and found myself a dear girlfriend, I do not have much time to just sit around and be my old self. Not saying this is a bad thing but most certainly I do want to just sit around and rot my day away. Alas, there is probably not possible for some time to come because time has indeed become a very precious and scarce commodity in recent times.

Still hate my job because it's a never ending cycle to complete jobs and commitments. Princess has rightly said that I am probably just complaining but still not motivated to look for another job. Yeah, that is true. Just hate myself for feeling lousy while it is MYSELF who is not moving.... So paradoxical... Just plain lazy or just lacking the courage to move?

My relationship with Princess is probably back to an acceptable loving level but yesterday I was a coward for not saying hello to a colleague (who is her ex-colleague too). I felt so bad.... Why should I be worried if I am no longer married? What has past is in the past so why so I still avoid.... Really should have slapped myself there and then. However, I must really, really thank my Princess for being so benevolent and didn't even blame me for reacting in such a manner..... I must have disappointed her there and then..... Stupid me....

Hopefully, in the very near future, I will earn, save or even strike Toto (wishful) to get enough $ to buy a good house for Princess..... Love her very much...